If caught sleeping on the job, here are some suggested responses: • They told me at the blood bank this might happen.
• This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to.
• Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper
• I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!
• This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!
• I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work-related stress. Are you discriminatory towards people who practice Yoga?
• Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem.
• The coffee machine is broke...
• Someone must've put decaf in the wrong pot.
• Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off!
• Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic! | NEW MOTIVATIONAL QUOTES FROM THE OFFICE
Quote from a recent meeting: "We are going to continue having these meetings, everyday, until I find out why no work is getting done."
Quote from the Boss: "I didn't say it was your fault. I said I was going to blame it on you."
A motivational sign at work: "The beatings will continue until morale improves."
A direct quote from the Boss: "We passed over a lot of good people to get the ones we hired."
Quote from the Boss after overriding the decision of a task force he created to find a solution: "I'm sorry if I ever gave you the impression your input would have any effect on my decision for the outcome of this project."
Human Resource Manager to job candidate: "I see you've had no computer training. Although that qualifies you for upper management, it means you're under-qualified for our entry level positions."
Quote from telephone inquiry: "We're only hiring one summer intern this year and we won't start interviewing candidates for that position until the boss' daughter finishes her summer classes."
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